Thoughts and a story

 Good news, I am writing again some. 

Bad news, I recently got a diagnosis for my mental health that is a bit concerning and means that I am going to have to put in some work to get through the things that I am experiencing.

As of an assessment I got yesterday, the things that I've previously associated with ADHD (diagnosed in 2022ish) are not actually stemming from ADHD at all. The things I am struggling with, including a lack of interest in things that were previously extremely important to me, might be stemming from Borderline Personality Disorder. Honestly, the BPD fits more than ADHD ever did. 

So, I'm dealing with that. On that happy note, here's a short story.

Blizzard

When I moved to Kansas, I thought I was escaping the snow. The cold and wet nonsense that took over my hometown for 4 months out of the year was annoying before I learned to drive, and even worse after. 

As a kid, you really appreciate the snow. You play outside, make snow people, build forts, have wars. Kids eagerly look forward to snow days, so much so that even the tiniest dusting is exciting.

Adults, on the other hand, have to deal with the snow. They're the ones who are supposed to dry sopping wet clothes, who have to plough driveways and navigate icy roads. 

So, the move to Kansas was an exciting one. No more snow to deal with. The temperatures were too warn for snow to stick around like it did at home.

Of course, Kansas does get some snow, but never for long. It'll snow, but it's dry and powdery, easily moved by the wind without even the need to plough. Within days it'll be gone. 

Or so I thought.

Apparently, Kansas gets blizzards, which was news to me. And you'd think the worst part of a blizzard would be the snow. Nope, it's not. 

It's the wind. Wind drops the temperature by -19 C, tearing roofs off houses and branches off trees. Signs are ripped apart like paper. On those days, it's best to stay inside.

But inside isn't much better. It seems that Kansas hasn't gotten the message that it gets snow, apparently at least one blizzard a year. 

Houses aren't insulated in any meaningful way, meaning the wind whistles through and the cold seeps in. No one knows how to drive in snow. It's apparently secret knowledge to stay inside if visibility is so bad you can't see the hood of your car from the drivers seat. Cars and trucks alike get stuck on the edges of town, where the wind is stronger and ice forms on the roads. Then the wind makes drifts around these cars and trucks and block the road even more.

Honestly, it's like no one knows how to drive in the winter, or deal with snow here. Probably because the snow melts so fast. A blizzard that drops 15 inches of snow on Wednesday will be forgotten on Saturday. 

I don't know exactly what I'm trying to say here. Snow sucks. Move to a desert. But a hot desert, not a desert like Antarctica or anything.

Writing Tip #39 - Branching Creativity

 Branching Creativity.

What an odd statement. What exactly do I mean by this?

Sometimes, it’s good to change tactics. I used to do this by having multiple stories with different plots on the go at the same time. That way, when one feels stale, I can get the creativity flowing by shifting gears. 

It’s like taking a minute to step back when something isn’t working. Like taking a bit of a break to get another perspective. 

Lately, for me, that’s taken the form of other hobbies, beyond writing. Writing has been a bit of a chore for me lately, and I’m not sure why. But I like being creative and getting the creativity moving, so I’ve been shifting gears a little. First I’ll paint, then I’ll do some writing while waiting for the paint to dry. Then I’ll do some 3D modelling, then write some when I’ve got my ideas flowing. It’s sort of like a warm up exercise for my brain.

I’m not sure if that’s helpful. But I find that doing something else when writing starts to feel too much like a chore helps to get the creative juices moving.

Life goes on

 Hey! Lots of changes going on in my life still. I've moved to the US, gotten married, and now I have time to write again. It's been some time.

It was comforting to open my old stories and see that nothing had changed. My characters, unlike the rest of my family, didn't go on without me. Some part of me knows that is selfish. Honestly though, I don't care.

Life means change. Sometimes change hurts, sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes we spend our days trying to keep hold of something that isn't meant to be held. 

And sometimes, we get to control that change. We get to fight and claw and wrestle things to be the way we want them. But then we wonder, is that the way it should be? Maybe we shouldn't have fought so hard? Maybe things would be better changing?

I'm thousands of miles from where I grew up. I meet people in the street, and none of them are my friends. People I used to see and talk to every day are now casual acquaintances, marked by an occasional message. 

I really don't know where I'm going with this. I guess just working through some level of grief. My life is completely different now. Not in a bad way. Just different. 

Change rarely seems good in the moment. The day I left my hometown, there were tears. I cried at my last day at work. The drive to the USA was long, I spent a good part of it sleeping. However, I've traded seeing my family and friends for a new family, one that I get to help create. And that is good. There are moments of longing for what used to be my home. But this is my home now. Honestly, I wouldn't change it for the world.

I know, I know. I'll get back to writing tips next week or something. Just had to get some thoughts out that have been bothering me for a bit.  

Updates

 Hey. It's been a while, I know it has. I doubt anyone is still coming to read this, but that's ok.

Plenty has happened since my last post, actually. I got engaged, am working on a visa so I can move to the US and get married. I quit my job (and started a new one). 

Got pretty depressed, still trying to get out of it. Maybe this needs to become less of a writing blog for now. Could use it as a sort of journal for what's going on in my life. Who knows. 

Anyway, hope anyone reading this is having a decent day. 

Writing Tip #38 - Know your Audience

 I can't believe I'm at tip #38 and I haven't addressed this already. Knowing your audience helps you to write for the people who will be reading your book. It will make a difference to things that seem like they shouldn't matter, like how fast you publish and where you publish.

So. Know your audience. The best way to do this is to be part of the audience for your genre. Ideally a fantasy author will read some fantasy. It just makes sense. As a reader, you can read other examples of the genre and see general guidelines for your own book. You can see what current trends are, take design ideas, and even find out what other readers think of that particular story.

Unfortunately, there isn't a big compiled guide for what to do and how to write for each genre. This is something you have to figure out on your own, or infer from other examples. 

I am a fantasy reader. I know what I like in a good fantasy novel. Things like a world that makes sense, some lore, different fantasy races (not necessarily elves and dwarves, but for me fantasy is often set in a world that is larger than the story that is being told.) If I am reading a novel set in our world, I don't enjoy magic being thrown at me out of nowhere. But you can still have a fantasy novel set in our world, it just needs to fit. Magic is a pretty fundamental thing to leave out until page 317. Even if you aren't going to have your main character aware of the magic, you should leave hints and clues for the reader to pick up on. 

Okay, rant over. That's something I've seen before and it bothered me. 

Another way you can get to know your audience is to engage with them. Talk to them. Ask questions. Ask them what, to them, makes a good book from the genre you are writing in. 

You can also do research, separate from reading other books in the genre and talking to your audience. The internet is a powerful resource, when used correctly. Often there is a lot of contradictory information, so read carefully. 

Yeah, that's all for now. Know your audience. 

This blog doesn't seem to have much of one at the moment, but I'd like to ask for suggestions on what you would like to see, as a reader. Feel free to comment on any one of my posts, or even email me at scribbler.collective@gmail.com.

Thanks, and have a good day.

Testimony

 No writing tip for you today. Just a story.

TESTIMONY

A transcription of the recordings made by Detective William Turner, October 27, 2004. Interviews with Sarah Johnson, Daniel Grady, Jacob Marshall and Mary Finn.

Click.

"Okay, Miss Johnson. Tell me exactly what happened. Where were you?"

"I-I was running. There's a forest behind the school that we play in sometimes. It's a huge forest. One time I got lost. I was so scared."

"And what school is that?"

"You know, my school. The one I go to. Greenview Elementary."

"Right. You were running in the forest."

"Yes." Shuffling sounds. "Am I in trouble? My dad said if he ever had to pick me up from the police station I'd be grounded for a month."

"No, Miss Johnson. You aren't in trouble. But I need to know what happened."

"We were playing. Hide and seek. I was hiding, Jacob was seeking. He's a good seeker. I'm pretty good at hiding, but not as good as Mary is." Shuffling. "Or Daniel."

"Who found the body?"

"Mary did. I heard her scream. Not a normal scream. It scared me. I knew I had to find her." Sniffling. "Jacob and Daniel were there when I found her. It was hard to see what they were looking at. I pushed Jacob. He fell. His knee was bleeding."

"Don't worry about Jacob, Sarah. He's fine. Tell me what you saw."

"There was a man. He wasn't moving, just laying there on the ground. His eyes were open, but he didn't blink. He was dead, wasn't he?"

"Yes, Sarah, he was."

"My grandma died, when I was little. Mom wouldn't let me go in her room to see."

"It's not something a child should have to see."

Sniffle. "Daniel poked him with a stick. His shirt was covered in brown. I don't think it was dirt, was it?"

"No, Sarah. It wasn't dirt."

"Mary was so white. It looked like she was a ghost. Is Mary okay, Detective Turner?"

"She'll be okay, Sarah. Maybe not right away, but she will. What happened after Daniel poked him with the stick?"

"We didn't know what to do. Daniel dared me to touch him. He was so cold. It wasn't like I was touching a person. Just a thing, like rubber. Almost like rubber boots." Crying sounds.

Door opens. "Detective, her parents are here."

"Sarah, you aren't in trouble. You did a good thing when you went to tell an adult. Go home with your parents now, ok?"

Click.

Click.

"Mr. Grady, would you like anything to drink? Some water maybe?"

"No."

"All right. Tell me exactly what happened this afternoon."

"We were playing. Found a dead guy. Do you know how he died?"

"Not just yet. What can you tell me about him?"

"I don't know. There was a lot of blood. Kinda smelled too. He'd been there for a bit."

"How do you know that?"

"Same thing happens when we don't clean up right away after butchering our chickens or pigs. Gotta make sure everything is clean, otherwise the flies get real bad. Can get so smelly you can barely walk in the barn."

"Your parents live on a farm."

"Yeah. I've seen dead before. Not people, but animals. A lot."

"Why'd you poke him with a stick?"

Shuffling. Chair scrapes.

"Daniel?"

"I dunno. Just wanted to, I suppose. Kinda thought it wasn't real, like one of those mannequins in clothes stores. Can I go home? My dad will be needing my help with the chores soon."

"We called him. He's on his way to pick you up."

Click.

Click. 

"Am I in trouble, sir?"

"No, Jacob. You're not. I just need to know what happened. As much as you can remember."

"We were playing in the forest. Sarah wanted to play hide and seek, like always. Daniel told me to just let her go hide and we'd explore. I'd go find her eventually."

Shuffling. "Who found the body?"

"We all did. Me, Mary and Daniel. Mary screamed. She's a scaredy-cat sometimes."

"What happened next?"

"Daniel dared me to touch him. I wouldn't. Part of me thought it was a prank. Daniel likes to pull jokes like that. One time he put jell-o in my backpack. My dad told me to clean his clock if he does anything like that again."

"So you were all together when you found the body?"

"Yeah, sorta. Mary was ahead of us. She tripped on him. We saw her fall and laughed. She got up and screamed. Sarah came running up a bit later. She's a pretty slow runner."

"She pushed you out of the way?"

"Yeah. I fell. Scraped my knee a bit. It's fine though. Daniel poked him with a stick, then Sarah touched him." Shuffle. "We didn't know what to do. Sarah and Daniel wanted me to go get an adult. I didn't want to go alone. I'm not a scaredy, but what if whoever left him was still out there?"

"What did Mary do?"

"She wouldn't stop staring at him. His eyes were open, but it was like he wasn't there. No one home, kinda. I'm pretty sure there was blood all over his shirt, and some on his face. I couldn't see his hands." Shuffle. "I've seen people die in movies before. That wasn't anything like this."

"It often isn't, unfortunately."

"Daniel and Sarah went to get someone, and I stayed with Mary. It was like she was a ghost. All white and pale. Almost like she was gonna faint."

Knocking. "Your parents should be here by now. Go home, Jacob."

Click.

Click.

"Mary, can you tell me what happened today?"

Sniffle.

"It's okay, Mary. You're not in any trouble here. I just need to know what happened."

Sniffle. Crying sounds. Hiccup.

"Do you need a glass of water?"

Door opens, closes. Sniffle. Door opens and closes.

"Here you go. It's cold. I got it from the fridge down the hall."

"Now, Mary. Can you tell me what happened?"

Sniffle.

"Take a deep breath and think for me, ok? You were exploring in the forest behind your school, is that right?"

Hiccup.

"You were running, and you tripped. What happened after that?"

Sob. 

"Okay. Take a deep breath. Your parents will be here in a minute. We don't have to talk about it today."

Click.

Writing Tip #37 - Preparation

 Apparently, I'm posting every two days... oh well. I suppose that works too.

Tip #37. Preparation. This covers a few things, such as preparing to write, preparing what you will write, and preparing the space where you write. Some of these things I've gone over before, so I'm just going to touch on them in a general way now, as a refresher for myself. 

Preparing the space where you write ties in to the last tip, which was identifying problems that stop you from writing. Basically, wherever you write, you want there to be minimal distractions. A comfortable chair, a charged laptop or tablet or phone or whatever device you write with. Maybe that means a nice pen and a notebook. Whatever it is. Have everything ready before you start to write so that when you start to write you don't need to stop in order to deal with these things. If you like coffee, have a cup of coffee nearby. Maybe a snack. It's up to you. Just have everything that you will need while you write close by so you don't have to get up.

Preparing to write is more of a mental step. Personally, I need to be in a certain mindset to write effectively. I need to be in a different mindset to edit. Maybe you don't. But I find that I don't write as much or as well when I am thinking about something else, or wanting to do something else. That may seem obvious, but its really that simple. If you aren't thinking about writing, you won't write as effectively. Simple.

Last, you need to prepare what to write. Whether you are a planner or a pantser, you need to have some sort of goal in mind. Maybe it's finishing a chapter or two. Maybe you have a big battle coming up and your characters need to get ready for it. Whatever. Just have a goal in mind. 

I, personally, am a pantser. I've always preferred to start writing with an end goal and figure out the rest along the way. But every time I sit down to write, I ask myself what my goal is. I come up with how the specific scene is going to end and I write to that. Because without a specific goal or plot point to aim for, your characters will likely end up wandering aimlessly, getting into adventures without an overarching theme or plan. 

That's all for now, I think. Just some thoughts and revisiting old ideas.